Monday, January 28, 2008

Fear despite the Father.

I am currently the father of three children, ages 4 years, 2 years, and 2 months. The experience of being a dad has been unique and eye-opening. Without being a dad, my understanding of God as the Father was very much theoretical, not that this is a bad thing. But, having been blessed with little halflings, I have often faced the inevitable situations where I compare my own experience as a father to that of my heavenly Father. My wife was instrumental in opening my eyes to this reality. She would say things like, "Imagine how God feels when we act like that" when a toddler lashes out in a tantrum. Thanks to my wife's example, I have come to see that children are one of God's ways of training us by giving us the opportunity to take on one of his roles. It has been a very humbling experience, for certain.

An example that came to mind recently was something I have wondered many times: Why do children get scared of a given thing despite the fact that their parents are close by, indicating no signs of fear themselves?

I have sat with a cowering child in my arms, assuring him that everything is okay and there is no reason to be afraid of whatever it was that frightened him. And yet he doesn't care that Daddy isn't crying. Daddy isn't worried. In fact, Daddy is smiling and acting as if nothing is out of the ordinary. Does that matter to the child? No, he still wants comfort because he's scared, regardless of my emotional state.

In this scene, I know in my mind that the child has no reason to worry in my presence. I will take care of him and see that his well-being is looked after. After all, I have always given him meals to satisfy his hunger; I have always come to his aid when he's cried out in the night; I have always protected him from potential dangers.

Despite my presence and his memories of my habit of faithfully caring for him, he is still scared. All that matters to him is his current worry. Observing him in this state, all I want for him is to take comfort in me and remember my spoken and unspoken promises to lovingly stand sentinel over him.

From the position of the caretaker, this makes sense. But what about when I'm in the position of the child? My worries aren't spurred on by weird shadows at the top of the stairs or spooky sounds and visions. But what about when the money seems to be running out? When I feel inadequate to care for a growing family? When I have to face another mortgage payment? When one of us develops a subtle and strange medical issue? When the stress of life in a sin-crushed world seems too heavy?

Now I'm the forgetful child. I've forgotten the perfect promises of the supernatural Father who has never made a mistake. I have years of life under my belt, and yet I still cower despite the presence of my heavenly Daddy. Have I learned nothing in all these years?

Thank God for children and the ways they open our eyes.

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." - 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV)

"So do not worry , saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?'" For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. - Matthew 6:31-32

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom." - Luke 12:32